lol. i guess it's been a million years since i've last updated since my comp had actually forgotten my password. what a sign. LOL

i would say that a million things have happened during this period of times. pioneering, release of Alvls results, ESS, moving on. haha. it seems like im moving onto a new phase of life really soon. and during this period of time, i think i've just gotten to know myself a lil bit better. yup, i need to be more thankful to God who has blessed me greatly in the past 18 years of my life. seriously, i wouldnt imagine a grade of ABC and actually a B in GP. but when i've actually got it, i think i wasnt that grateful of this wonderful blessing. and maybe this is how quickly human forgets about how good God has been to them. i was thinking, if i actually screwed up my Alvls, maybe i would cling onto God even tighter, like praying to God every single moment of my life cuz i'd NEED his guidance and blessings to be upon me. but when i got it, yah, im thankful, and im glad. but i think the extent of gratitude that i've shown is alot less intense as compared to how i'd be praying and seeking God if i did badly for my Alvls. so, i'm here to repent, and im truly grateful and extremely contented/satisfied with my grades. i think a 'thank You,God' isn't really enough to 'reciprocate' God with what He had done in my life. so, i guess all i can do now is to let Him lead me to whever He wants me to. cuz even with this grades, i still duno where i want to go to. God, plese do whatever you want with me.

yup, and during this period of time, im actually quite disgusted with myself, as in not trying to emo here or what. lol. firstly, with the issue that i've stated above. so, i need to start giving thanks to whatever i've been given with and whenever i start doing something. one thing that struck me quite me quite hard was what pastor shirley said, that it's not God that doesnt want to bless, He's merely waiting for the one that has the faith to thank Him in advance for whatever she's praying for, then He'll give. so, am i gonna be the one that has the faith? i guess tis shouldnt be a qns. i'll need to have faith. i mean. i should have faith in God since He's the creator of my life.

the second thing is about anger management, this is THE pitfall of my life. im sick of being impatient/angry. and im angry at myself being angry at stuffs most of the time. if i overcome this obstacle in my life, i guess there's nothing too difficult to be conquered anymore. i need to pratise self-control. im the master of my mind, and of course, my mouth, my actions. liting, please.................................................................................................................................................... one big area of growth. and a very taunting one. God, p-a-t-i-e-n-c-e. where is it in my life? lol. =/



ESS and pioneering..... i guess the only word to this is 'faith' and God has His plans for us. i'll have to trust in Him. more and more and more and more and more and more and more and more and more and more and more and more and more. and God, i shall have the faith to thank You for a better-tempered liting in near future. Amen. lol.