hmm .. here to blog cuz i 2 daez nvr online ler .. hmm .. 18/9 .. kitmun bdae .. went to escape .. was a fun but tiring dae .. we took 17 to escape frm sch and .. played 2 tyms each of yakult .. bumper boat, wet n wild , go-kart , and panasonic each and one tym flipper .. woah half my life gonex le .. take bus tt tym stiu haf tt kinda feelin tt i nid to grab vv tightly if not will fly out haha .. den ermz the nxt dae 19/9 SPE .. at NTU .. woke up at 530 .. was kinda tired .. but i tink it's worth it .. great experience .. hmm .. thou we dint win .. sorry to disappoint coach .. haiz .. dono larr .. i dint play much either .. nw i v tiredx .. my injuries are actin up agn .. me ryt knee .. me elbow .. dono larr .. haiz .. smetyms .. i dono why i fight so hard ? mebbe u dun tink tt im fightin hard .. im i tink i am .. at least im tryin bahz .. but nw .. i feel so lost .. i dono why im doin tis .. 1 and 1/2 months no training .. den coach wil choose 'b' div le .. me lehz ? do i hav a chance or place to stand at all ? wo hen pa .. fight so hard dun hav jie guo .. sit bench oso shuang ? budden .. haiz .. dono bahz .. havin a bad sore throat nw .. it hurtz .. ytd i rammed into kangli .. our sides of the stomach hit each other while durin our 'square' .. quite pain .. impact kinda big .. but shud b okiez larr .. onli hurt if i make big action .. i try to shake off the insecure feelin .. but i realised tt i carn do it .. im so uselez bahh .. netball ish my everything .. netball and frenz .. im so lost nw .. smetyms im wonderin .. wad will happen to sports players when they're old .. not every sports player can b lyk jiangsen he-sen or Coach wad .. our muscles will sag .. and bcum fats .. we wun b tt fit anymur .. we may run 2.4km in 16 mins bahh when we're 40 .. haiz .. i dun wana tink of tt .. but tt scares .. and .. all sports players gainish steroeotyped yan guang and whole body of injuries ? im not tryin to say tt im regret bein a sport player but .. itz jus tt .. my mum ish pullin me dwn everytym .. and things arent goin tt well either .. mum says .. gers shudden play balls .. itz fer guys .. i disagree .. but wad can i say ? my family tinks tt wae .. smetyms .. i dun wana b a ger .. dono lei .. feel .. tt . mum always lyk boys mur lohz .. fer example .. my mum lohz .. i dun get it larr .. gers carn do boys' stuf mehz ? i wana prove to her tt gers can lo .. anyway no one reli treat me as a ger liaoz wad . nt even mysf .. so itz lyk .. i wana do boys' thing oso carn meh ? but she scold me lyk i did smething illegal lydat .. i onli shakin my leg lo .. not as if vv vigorously tt kind .. onli lyk swingin it lohz .. i oso nvr lift it vv high lohz !! im jus bein myself .. i mean since im lil .. me alrdy play and fight wif my bro zhang da le .. me mix wif my bro frenz til i hav my own clinque .. me born tomboy-ish cannot meh ? issit wrong to choose shorts over skirts .. blue over pink .. playin ball over playin instruments .. playin and shoutin lyk no one's arnd over sittin arnd quietly ? i dono larr .. i wun b tt kinda wen rou ger .. nt eva .. so pls pls dun expect so much frm me ke yi marx ? if u wan me b girly .. shud cong xiao pei yang me to be a ger wad .. but not once .. did u care abt me lohz .. all u care was him .. everything he's ryt .. wad abt me .. supposed im a jinx or wad ryt .. i dono larr .. suddenly feel so unfair-ed .. haiz .. suan le larr .. this ish my life .. i rule it the wae i wan .. but im so sick n tired of it liaoz .. sick of fightin too .. sick of everything .. haiz . headache .. suan le .. zao liaoz .. buaiz .. =(

*wang ji ba ni wang ji ..
** wo shi wo .. ni yao wo zen me gai bian ? wo bu hui .. wo bu hui ying wei ren he ren er gai bian cheng yi ge wo bu shi de ren .. wo shi wo ..